48 Answers
Anna Lundberg, Personal coach and business consultant
Setting goals will give you a sense of purpose, focus your limited time and energy on what’s really important, and motivate you to achieve something that is meaningful to you.
Ultimately, setting goals is about intentionally creating the life that you want; one step at a time.
I’d say there are a few things you need to do to make sure that your goals are really contributing to a fulfilling and meaningful life.
- Having the right goals in place is fundamental to successfully achieving them, and for that achievement to really contribute to your happiness and life satisfaction.
A meaningful goal is one that you’ve been thinking about for months or even years. This shows commitment, which will be important in getting you over that finishing line.
A meaningful goal is one for which you are intrinsically motivated, versus someone else telling you that you should do it. Again, this will make sure that you’re committed to working hard in order to achieve it.
A meaningful goal is one that is consistent with your personal values.
A meaningful goal is one that you’re willing to work hard for. More than what you have to do to achieve it, ask yourself: what are you willing to give up?
And a meaningful goal is one that will truly have an impact on your life, in terms of your happiness, wellbeing, general life satisfaction, or any other aspect of your life that is important to you.
You might consider using the Wheel of Life to set goals across different priorities in your life: Anna Lundberg’s answer to What techniques and habits are most effective for managing and balancing priorities?
- Before you start working towards your goal, work on visualising it, imagining what it would be like if you actually achieved it, to see if you really, really want it.
Try this visualisation exercise:
Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths. As you breathe out, let go of any tension you’re feeling at the moment, any worries, any little niggles. Once you’re feeling relaxed and present, you’re going to shift your focus forwards and imagine yourself in the future.
Imagine that you’ve done all the planning, overcome all the obstacles… and you’ve accomplished that goal. You’ve actually done it! Maybe it’s the actual day on which you’ve accomplished it – you’re holding a copy of your book in your hand for the first time, you’ve got your first customer with your new business, you’ve just arrived home after finishing your round-the-world trip. What are you doing at this very moment? What are you wearing? Who are you with? What can you hear going on around you? How do you feel? Take your time to notice how you’re feeling in different parts of your body, what you’re thinking about, what are the emotions that you’re experiences.
Now take a few more deep breaths, enjoy that moment; then come back to the present, and open your eyes.
If you’re now thinking, “WOW, I want that feeling,” if your heart is still racing after this visualisation exercise, if you know you’ll regret not doing it when you look back on your life… then the answer is a big, thumping, YES.
- Once you’ve achieved the goal, make sure you pause for a moment to acknowledge your achievement and to celebrate your success.
I’m a big fan of goals. They give you a sense of purpose, they focus your time and energy on what matters most, and they motivate you to achieve something that is really meaningful to you. However, many of us – yes, myself included – have a tendency to simply move on to the next goal, to keep raising the bar, to keep going and going.
It’s great that we challenge ourselves to reach ever higher, but I believe it’s absolutely vital that we pause to celebrate our progress. Think back to where you were a year ago, remind yourself of how much has changed, and give yourself a pat on the back for getting this far. Eat a piece of your favourite chocolate, go out for dinner with your partner, book a massage… just do SOMETHING to specifically recognise and celebrate your accomplishment.
If we don’t take stock now again, if we don’t enjoy what we are creating for ourselves, then why bother in the first place?!
Ultimately, setting goals is about intentionally creating the life that you want; one step at a time. Making sure that you have the “right” goals in place, goals that you truly, deeply desire, and making sure that you celebrate once you have achieved them, will ensure that you’ll never regret the effort you’ve put into achieving them.
Can I also recommend Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl? A holocaust survivor and psychiatrist, he argues that it is not happiness but MEANING, purpose, that we are all looking for, that is what matters most as we live our lives. The classic tribute to hope from the Holocaust: Viktor E Frankl
All I know for certain is that I have been given this time on earth. More than that, I’m incredibly fortunate to have been born into a time and a place that gives me almost endless possibilities. So the only question I need to ask myself is what I will do with this time that I’ve been given. Right now, I’m focused on helping other people find their meaning, their personal path to living their most fulfilled lives, whatever that means for them (via my personal coaching alongside my business consulting and leadership training: Anna S. E. Lundberg). But I’ll probably continue to try to answer that question until my last dying breath!
Quoting Viktor Frankl:
“Ultimately, man should not ask what the meaning of his life is, but rather he must recognize that it is he who is asked.”
So the beauty of life is that we each get to answer the question for ourselves… What’s your answer going to be?
